Stressed by Stress?

 

I am posting a little early today because I anticipate a very busy day, perhaps even stressful.  Bless you all in your times of stress.

2 Corinthians 1:8-11

We’ve heard the word stress so often in relation to the challenges we face that you might assume it was always a term related to psychology.  It’s not.  It’s an engineering term.  It refers to the forces that tend to strain or deform a body.  Many of you will remember the 1967 collapse of the Silver Bridge across the Ohio.  Investigators concluded, “The failure resulted from stress corrosion and corrosion fatigue, two concepts which were not known in 1927 [when the bridge was built]. It was also found that the flaw could not have been detected, even by today's methods, unless the bridge was taken apart and tested.”  Today, engineers attempt to anticipate stress and the impact it will have on a structure.

No wonder, we’ve seized on “stress” to describe some of our experiences in times of challenge.

The language Paul uses pictures a situation in which he felt “utterly and unbearably weighed down—crushed.”  In particular, he suffered from a deep sense of despair.  He says, “we despaired even of life.”  The original word is interesting it means “without any exit.”  Paul seems to be saying, “We saw no way out of our situation except death.” In other words, he was stressed.

For centuries Bible students have tried to unravel the mystery of what situation Paul was taking about.  Evidently the Corinthians knew the details so Paul felt no need to repeat them.  Apparently whatever took place occurred took place while he was in “Asia” the province which is now known as Turkey; but just where is not clear.  Furthermore it must have taken place sometime `after Paul had written First Corinthians; consequently it was a fairly recent experience.

Had Paul been the object of an assassination plot?

Had he encountered more rioting such has that which occurred in Ephesus?

Had he been seriously ill, with a doubtful prognosis for recovery?

We don’t know.  We do know it was one of the darkest periods in his life. 

Perhaps it’s just as well we don’t know all the details of Paul’s experience.  It makes it easier for us to see that Paul might sympathize with us as we face times of stress.  Haven’t we sometimes felt there was no way out of our situation?  Haven’t we sometimes felt as if the weight of some problem or situation was about to crush us?

If so, we need to consider what Paul discovered.  Even though he was an experienced Christian he learned something important about facing stress.  Like Paul, we need to understand that the key to facing stress is found in our faith.

If You Want to Face Stress Successfully Look Outside Yourself.

The first thing Paul discovered was that he had no hope of escape if he tried to fight the battle on his own.  Had Paul lived in the 21^st century there would have been those who counseled him to “look inside” for the strength he needed.  In the midst of the battle Paul had looked and discovered the arsenal was empty.  He had no strength or personal resources which could get him through that tough time.

But, looking back, he realized the very experience had taught him a valuable lesson.  He told the Corinthians that the experience was designed to “keep us from trusting and depending on ourselves instead of on God.”

Paul was a brilliant man.  He would be considered a great scholar.  Yet, his scholarship was insufficient to get him out of the situation which brought him to death’s door.  His friends couldn’t get him out.  In fact, if his friends got too close, they would be in trouble too.  The use of the plural “we” suggest Timothy was in the same situation.

His only recourse was to trust God, not himself, in this situation.  French Arrington explains the process.

Whatever the exact nature of the peril, the result was despair.  He was like a ship that is overcrowded with cargo and is gradually sinking.  His burden was too great.  His condition, so he thought, was fatal.  Convinced “the sentence of death” had been passed upon him, he gave up all hope of living.  He lost confidence in anything he could do.  Death knocked on his door, but his suffering was not futile.  What happened threw him back on God and his mercy.  The adversity and deliverance taught him not to rely on himself but on God who raises the dead.

God rescued Paul in a dangerous situation.  He learned the hard way the vanity of self-confidence and the importance of confidence in God.  Like most of us he did not know what the future held, but he knew the One who holds the future.

Sadly, some people who come to the conclusion that all doors leading to relief from their pain and stress are firmly locked do give up.  They may commit suicide.  They may turn to drugs or alcohol.  They may embrace some form of escapist religion, one which denies the reality of their situation.  None of this will help. 

Fortunately, Paul gives us a further clue.

 

If You Want to Face Stress Successfully Nurture a Well-Grounded Faith

The New Testament teaching on faith tells us that faith has both an objective element and a subjective element.  At the same time, it has a past, present, and future dimension.

The objective element of the faith through which Paul faced his stressful time focused on the great act of God in raising Jesus from the dead.  Paul recalls this act when he refers to the God in whom he trusts as “the God who raises the dead.” 

 In his earlier epistle to the Corinthians he had insisted that the resurrection of Christ was foundational to Christianity.  Eliminate the resurrection and the Faith will crumble.  Yet, Paul was absolutely convinced of the reality of Christ’s Resurrection.  That reality was at the heart of his preaching: the resurrection was part of almost every sermon he is reported to have preached.  But the interesting—and very human—fact is, in the midst of his Asian crisis Paul seems to have momentarily forgot what he’d been preaching for years.

But suddenly it struck him.  “I could die in this situation,” he may have said to himself, “yet my God is the God who has beaten death!”  That was the turning point.  Paul’s subjective response to the objective element of the Faith was trust.  In the midst of his tough situation he could rely on God to do what was best for him, to bring him out or bring him home.  In view of the Resurrection, everything was in perspective.  That’s why one early Christian told the persecutors, “You can kill us but you can’t really harm us.”

As a result, Paul’s faith was rejuvenated.  Strangely, and I don’t think I’m being too bold to say this, his faith after the crisis was stronger than it was before.  Certainly, it had that three-dimensional quality I spoke of earlier.

                        ·         Well-grounded faith has a past dimension.  Paul could look back and see those times when God had been there to rescue him.  That record of God’s past actions established a precedent for trusting God whatever might come his way.

                        ·         Well-grounded faith has a present dimension.  God “will still rescue and save us,” Paul says.  That assurance must have informed his ministry, giving him a new boldness to venture into new territory and to proclaim his message with even greater assurance.

                        ·         Well-grounded faith has a future dimension.  The Amplified Bible stresses element of hope for the future found in this statement.  It renders the latter part of verse 10:  “…in and on Him we have set our hope (our joyful and confident expectation) that He will again deliver us from danger and destruction and draw us to Himself.”

 Now, Paul’s faith was mature enough that he would not claim that God’s “rescue” would always take the form he expected or that such a divine intervention would always be recognized as such by the watching world.  But even so God would be behind the rescue.  R. C. H. Lenski imagines Paul and his co-worker Timothy exuberant over God’s intervention on their behalf.  He says, “Their wonderful deliverance, which is still so vivid in their minds, makes them see God’s deliverance in the days to come….  After such a supreme deliverance will God ever fail them?  God, the Deliverer, is his name.  When he then does let us die, when his work with us on earth is completed, he removes us with a final deliverance, the most blessed of all.” 

As a consequence, Paul’s attitude toward death was markedly different than that of many of his contemporaries.  Rather than see death as the end, he is able to see it as a beginning.

Our Christian brothers and sisters of an earlier age seem to have understood this better than we do.  As Adoniram Judson, the first Baptist missionary from America, lay on his death bed he said:

“I am not tired of my work, neither am I tired of the world;   yet when Christ calls me home, I shall go with the gladness of a boy bounding away from his school.  Perhaps I feel something like the young bride when she contemplates resigning the pleasant association of her childhood for a dearer home—though only a little like her, for there is no doubt resting on my future.”

Paul’s hope had grown, just as our hope grows, by his knowledge of the Scripture and by his experience of God’s actions on his behalf.  Those experiences out of his past gave him a well-grounded faith for the present and the future.

For some, Paul has said all that needed to be said:  Don’t trust yourself, trust God.

Yet, Paul didn’t leave it there.  He added one more comment which merits our attention.

If You Want to Face Stress Successfully, Find a Personal Support System

Verse 11 is challenging.  Even Southern Baptist New Testament scholar A. T. Robertson says, “It is indeed a difficult sentence to understand.”

Part of the difficulty lies with the fact that Paul is dealing with the mystery of prayer.   Like many of you I have some questions about prayer.  Just how are we to pray in certain situations?  Just what do some of the promises regarding prayer mean?  This is not the time to sort through them but I do want to admit I don’t have all the answers.  Still, I can say a few things about this verse with a degree of certainty.

 To begin with, I agree with Lenski that it cannot mean, as some have suggested, that somehow God is more likely to help us out of a tough spot the more people pray for us.  That doesn’t present a very appealing picture of God; it makes God seem selfish and it makes our situation precarious since escape depends on the faithfulness of others to pray.

I believe Paul is commending the Corinthians for being part of his support system.  This may not be the complete meaning of the verse but I think Paul, at least, is letting his readers know that their support, even at a distance, is invaluable.  In fact, their support is so valuable that he considers them to be laboring with him through their prayers.

Remember, Paul has just declared his utter dependence upon God.  At the same time, this statement seems to indicate that he is not indifferent to the support of his fellow believers.  While Paul is by no means suggesting that God would not have rescued him had the Corinthians not prayed, he is saying that, because of their prayers, the Corinthians have helped to bring glory to God for the divine rescue.   For that they can be thankful.

This word of recognition implies that strong faith in God does not preclude a role for human support as we face stress.  We are not to be “lone ranger” Christians.  Believers are interdependent, we need each other and, in this situation, Paul indicates that the reliance of believers upon one another extends beyond any local congregation.

Here Paul specifically mentions prayer as a way to help those facing stressful situations.  By no means should we minimize the prayers of our fellow-Christians when we are facing a tough time.   In his letters Paul frequently asks his readers to pray for him.  What’s especially remarkable here is that he is thanking the Corinthians for their prayers—the Corinthians, a more messed-up band of Christians would have been hard to find!  Yet, Paul knew the God of grace had heard their prayers on his behalf.

Elsewhere Paul will mention other ways we can show support to those facing stressful situations.  These may include sharing a word about God’s activity in your own life, providing practical help, giving a word of encouragement, or just being a friend.

The point is, when you face stress don’t isolate yourself.  Don’t think that faith demands you go it alone.  God has placed us in a community of believers for a reason.  His goal for that community is that it be a place where encouragement is the watchword of the day. 

 

                                                               Conclusion

Few of us face the stressful situations Paul did; we don’t face angry mobs determined to stop us at any cost.  Some of us do face stressful health issues, family problems, or business crises.  All of us face stress. 

Facing stress successfully involves a variety of skills.  Most of them can be learned from books and articles.  But here are some perspectives you won’t find just anywhere.

There’s the call to have a deep reliance upon God—a trust that leaves the present and the future in his hands.

There’s is a call to be open with others about our needs—to allow them to place a shoulder under the crushing weight to help us through the tough time.

The key to facing stressful situations is our faith.  This is a faith that teaches us to trust God for the present and the future, a faith which  teaches us to rejoice in the support we have from community of faith, a community made up of real people who have faced real stress and come away with real testimonies of  God’s grace.

 

STANDING OUT FROM THE CROWD

Proverbs 31:10-31

 

            The Book of Proverbs has several things to say about women.

            --Some of those statements are quite complimentary.

            --Some of those statements are mildly amusing to those men who read them and not a little provoking to those women who read them.

             So, when I say the Book of Proverbs ends with an essay about women, you might wonder what it will say--will it be complimentary or infuriating?

            You will find it one of the most surprising essays about women in all of ancient literature.

             Listen to Proverbs 31:10-31.

***********************************************

Years ago, when I was preparing a message for Mother’s Day I came across this quotation: “A boy’s best friend is his mother.”  That sounds pretty nice.  Anyone remember who said it?  That’’s right.  Norman Bates, devoted son, motel manager, and amateur taxidermist.  You know, from Psycho.

I suppose the sentimental view of motherhood that once shaped Mother’s Day sermons doesn’t sell well in most churches today.  We have a more realistic view of the women who are our mothers.  We acknowledge their foibles, failures, and flaws; we know that they, like the men who are our fathers, are sinners, it’s just that we came to that conclusion about men so much sooner.

That might bother some of you; maybe even make you just a little miffed.  For others, though, it may take a great burden off your shoulders.  If your child should complain because you’re not perfect, you can answer, “That’s never going to happen.”

At the same time you’re set free from the awesome responsibility to try to be some kind of mythic mother, the mother who really resembles the women described by the poets and the greeting card writers.  All you have to do is be the best mother you can be, the real you can be.

The Bible can’t help you be the mythical mother but it can help you be the best mother you can be. 

With that in mind we’re going to look at a passage which is sometimes titled “the virtuous woman.” The word translated “virtuous” is packed with meaning.  It includes the ideas of moral uprightness, courage, strength, and competence.  In fact, one modern translation refers to her as a “competent” wife.  I think the words imply this woman is not, as they say, so heavenly-minded to be of no earthly use.

If it seems a strange way to end the Proverbs, keep something in mind.  Proverbs begins as a manual of practical instruction for a young man on the threshold of adulthood.  It’s appropriate that it should end with the counsel to help such a young man be wise in making the most important decision he will ever make:  The decision about whom to marry.

The woman the young man would marry will, ultimately, become the mother of his children.  So what is said here has a direct bearing on being the best possible mother.  The lesson the passage teaches is really a simple one:  The best women make the best mothers.

à  This clearly runs contrary to any notion which suggests that the best women “waste” their lives if they become mothers.

            à At the same time, it does not mean that mothers are the best women, that those who aren’t mothers are somehow deficient.  It simply means that the woman who sets out to be a mother should first set out to be the best woman she can be.

 

            With all this in mind, let's look at the portrait of a remarkable woman.

            It’s not certain who wrote Proverbs 31:10-31.  Not even certain if it should be included in the proverbs attributed to Lemuel's mother (vs. 1).  If it is we have a  mother’s advice to her son about the kind of woman he should look for.

            In the Hebrew text the poem is an acrostic (each verse begins with a the successive letter of the alphabet).

            This is a portrait of a woman who stood out from the crowd.  In some Jewish communities the husbands and children recite this poem every Friday night to honor their wives and mothers.  The details of the description are interesting.

            1.  The value of such a woman is far above that of jewels.

            2.  Her husband can put complete trust in her.

            3.  Their relationship is enduring and promotes good.

            4.  She takes care of business, doing what needs to be done for the well-being of her family.

            5.  She makes decisions wisely--such as buying land.

            6.  She works hard to make sure that her business prospers.

            7.  She has compassion for the poor and the needy.

            8.  Her family is well cared for even when facing winter's blast. 

            9.  The implication seems to be that she and her husband work together as partners; his prominence is due, in part, to her hard work.

            10.  She faces the future with calmness.

            11.  She is wise and her words are worth listening to.

            12.  Her demeanor, behavior, love, and virtue win praise for her from her husband and children.

            13.  Her spiritual relationships shape all that she is.

 

            A woman with these qualities would be remarkable in any age.  But this woman stands out from the crowd because she made her mark in a time and in a place when it was difficult to be a woman.  Although conditions for Jewish women in OT days was better than they were for women in many nations, so powerful were the cultural forces that women in Israel were still regarded with disdain by many.

Here’s a reminder that by the grace of God a woman can be the best she can be in the most difficult of times.   The high praise given this woman of Proverbs 31 says several things to contemporary women who want to be the best women they can be.

 

I

IT'S OKAY TO USE YOUR TALENTS

 

1.  Somewhere the notion has arisen that a woman shouldn't display her talents. 

For a long time we've known little girls were as bright as little boys in grade school, then in high school the boys began to move ahead.  One suggestion for this occurrence is that girls have not been encouraged to develop skills in math, science, etc.  We’re beginning to get past this but it’s still a struggle on some levels to win the right to be good.

2.  This woman's use of her talents worked to the mutual benefit of her and her family.

. 

 

II

IT'S OKAY TO BE STRONG

           

1.  No doubt this woman was strong.

She was successful when the culture didn't want her to be successful.

Is there any doubt she was strong?  The word translated as “strong” can mean “military might.”  This woman was a force to be reckoned with.

2.  We have always needed strong women.  They have built our nation and our churches.

Children need two strong parents.  In a single parent home, the child needs one very strong parent.

           

III

IT'S OKAY TO SHOW COMPASSION

 

1.  Perhaps in response to the unfair stereotypes they've had to overcome at times, some women have determined to suppress any tendency toward tenderness, kindness, and compassion.  (Dame Edith Evans “When a woman behaves like a man why doesn’t she behave like a nice man?”)

2.  The Proverbs 31 woman unashamedly shows compassion toward the poor; yet, no one who had dealt with her in the marketplace or in a land deal would ever point to that as evidence of weakness.

 

IV

IT’S OKAY TO BE SPIRITUALLY RESPONSIBLE

1.  This woman is said to “fear the Lord.”  In the wisdom literature, like Proverbs, fearing the Lord meant seeing God as God and ordering your life accordingly.  This woman did that.

2.  We must never diminish the spiritual contributions of women to the home and family.  In Protestant churches in the west, women have outnumbered men in our congregations since the seventeenth century. It’s probably impossible to guess the contributions they have made to our churches and our spiritual heritage. 

V

IT'S OKAY TO ACCEPT PRAISE

 

1.  Praise is hard for some people to take, especially hard for some women to take.

--Some have been taught that accepting praise is the mark of conceit, even if their work is outstanding.

--Some suffer from a sense of inferiority and low self-esteem.

Psychologist Gary Collins lists some characteristics inferiority and low self-esteem.  You probably know women who exhibit these:

They feel isolated and unlovable.

They are angry, but afraid of angering others or drawing attention to themselves.

They have difficulty getting along with others.

They often exhibit jealousy and criticism of others.

They exhibit self-criticism, self-hatred, and self-rejection.

They seek to gain control over others.

They have an inability to accept compliments or expressions of love. ¹

2.  Our sense of self-worth grows out of our self-image. 

You are God's creation.  You are the object of God's redeeming love.

Some women, even women in our churches don’t know that. But so what?  The mothers who create the most havoc in their homes are those mothers who have some psychological need to prove themselves, to demonstrate that the secret fears of worthlessness they harbor are lies.  A woman healthy enough to accept sincere praise is able to avoid some of the destructive habits which have scarred children of every generation.  The beautiful thing about the gospel is the fact that, even if a mother has inherited a sense of worthlessness from her mother, the cycle can be broken; she can see herself as valuable in God’s estimate.

3.  Women can accept praise for their accomplishments, because those accomplishments reflect a God-given creativity and giftedness.  James Moffatt’s translation is interesting, “Charms may wane and beauty wither, keep your praise for a wife with brains…”

That creativity and giftedness can be reflected in your work whether it is done at home, the office, the classroom, or wherever.

 

CONCLUSION

The woman of Proverbs 31 was the best she could be in a difficult time.

Her life was not lived in angry isolation from others.  It was lived in a threefold context.

--the context of her family. She and her husband were truly partners.  She did not feel cheated because much of her energy was expended on her family.

--the context of her society.  She didn't let the attitudes of some stop her from being all she could be.

--the context of her community of faith.  She was "a woman who fears the LORD". 

Because she lived her life in these contexts, she became an example to others.

This passage hints at the state of the marriage this woman was part of.  Admittedly, this marriage is painted in very broad strokes; none of us can fill in all the details we would see if we could be the proverbial fly on the wall observing this husband and wife interact.

But this much is clear, this marriage was a marriage marked by mutual respect, mutual support, and mutual effort.

_______________________

1 Gary Collins, Christian Counseling:  A Comprehensive Guide, p. 352.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Blessings Add Up

 

Matthew 5:43-45

You might not recognize Stephen Tobolowsky’s name but you’d probably recognize his face.  A character actor, he’s appeared in some 200 films and almost as many TV programs.  You may have seen him in Groundhog Day, Heroes, or Glee in which he played the previous choir director. 

I recently heard Tobolowsky tell this story.  I’ll abbreviate it.  Several years ago, Tobolowsky began to have trouble with his voice.  He was told he would have to have throat surgery that would require him to be silent for a month before and about two months after.  During his convalescence he began to have neck pains.  A visit to a specialist revealed he had severe arthritis in his neck.  Nothing could be done about it but it wouldn’t keep him from leading a full life. 

Then in 2009 Tobolowsky and his wife visited friends in Iceland.  As they had on previous visits, they went horseback riding.  Tobolowsky’s horse threw him off and he was knocked unconscious with an injury to his neck.  Doctors believed the actor had simply fractured his neck.  In an airport the way back home he met an orthopedic surgeon who asked about his neck brace. When the doctor heard the details of the accident and Tobolowsky's symptoms, he urged him to see a specialist as soon as possible since he suspected the damage was worse than thought.   Back in Los Angeles, he learned his neck was actually broken.  In fact, five vertebrae in his neck were shattered.  The good news was, his neck would heal.  But the doctor told him he should have died.

What kept the break from severing his spine?  The doctor explained it was the arthritis.  The condition sent the shock outward instead of inward where it would have damaged the spinal cord. 

During his recovery, Tobolowsky, who is Jewish, spent some time reading the Talmud.  In it, he says he read of how God’s blessings can sometimes come in disguise.  His arthritis was such a blessing.

In my text, Jesus, who was Jewish, is talking about God’s indiscriminate love, a love bestowed on everyone, alike.  To underscore this point, Jesus used a phrase that is often misunderstood.  In fact, it is often assumed to mean the very opposite of Jesus’ intention.  Jesus said that God “makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the righteous and on the unrighteous.”  Many take that statement to mean that bad things happen to all of us.  In fact, it means that good things happen to all of us.

The rising sun promises a new day of life and opportunities.  The rain, as Jesus’ listeners in that semi-arid land knew, meant the crops would thrive and grow.  God does good things for all persons, apart from his gift of salvation to those who believe.  The more we reflect on this common grace the more we are likely to recognize that God gives many of his blessings anonymously.

When we count our blessings, we are declaring to ourselves that we have broken the seal of anonymity, affirming that we understand, in the words of James, that “every good and perfect gift comes from above.”  As you and I set out to make counting our blessings a regular spiritual exercise, this is where we should begin.  It reminds us that we are on God’s mind all the time, not just when it comes to the big stuff. 

Counting our blessings starts us thinking about our lives.  When you truly count your blessings, you have to think about the details of your life.  You have to reflect on what you wouldn’t change even if there is a long list of things you would gladly change.  

Let me make sure you understand what I’m saying.  If you are going through a rough patch, a time of stress and trouble, take the time to think of all the best things in your life.  Make a list of your treasured relationships, your valued experiences, your best victories, your key discoveries.  How many of those things are the product of the hard times you've faced?  If getting rid of the hard times of your life also meant getting rid of the best things of your life, would you do it?  The things you would keep even if it meant keeping your troubled times should be prominent on any list you may make when you count your blessings.  I’m suggesting this exercise so you won’t allow your troubles to blind you to the blessing that are part of your life. 

Let me make something else clear:  Counting your blessings doesn’t deny the negative in your life, but it insists the negative isn’t all there is.

Let me repeat that:  Counting your blessings doesn’t deny the negative in your life, but it insists the negative isn’t all there is. 

And even in the negative we might find some surprises.  Linda Yates is a pastor in Canada.  She is also a cancer-survivor.  In some of her sermons, she shared insights she discovered as she faced the disease that threatened her life.  As she took the powerful drugs to fight her cancer, she began to thank God for the scientists whose research produced the drugs, the custodians who kept the drug factory clean, the truck drivers who brought the drugs to her pharmacy, the pharmacist who sold her the drugs.  This reminded her to look for blessings in the details, details it might be easy to overlook.

As we count our blessings we’ll eventually realize blessings come in several categories.  They each play a part in our lives and reflect the indiscriminate love God bestows on us.

We should count the blessings that delight us.  That’s easy.  We even sing about them and testify about how they demonstrate God’s care for us.

We should count the blessings that challenge us.  That’s a bit tougher.  Bryan used the term “blessons” recently.  That’s what a lot of these blessings that challenge us are, a chance to learn.  Of course, sometimes the challenge involves discerning what we’re supposed to learn.

As complete as our list might eventually be, we’re probably going to miss some blessings.  We might think of these as the blessings that puzzle us, trick us, elude us.  We might discover that something—like arthritis in the neck—we would have never classified as a blessing really was.  

Still, even knowing we will miss something, shouldn’t keep us from making that list.

Starting the List.

How do we start the list?  How do we begin to count our blessings when we’ve be in the habit of calculating our troubles?

Sir John Templeton, the British philanthropist, who funded the Templeton Award for Excellence, starts the day with a simple exercise.  As he lies in bed, before getting up in the morning, he lists five new things for which he should be grateful.  That might mean setting the alarm a few minutes earlier but it could be a valuable exercise.

Over the years, I’ve known many people who persist in dwelling on the bad things that have happened to them over a lifetime.  They remember every insult they’ve received; they reflect on every failure, they replay every hurt.  What if they changed their thinking pattern?  What if they began to focus on those experiences that were beneficial to their lives, “blessings,” in other words?  It could change their outlook.  If you are in the habit of focusing on the negative, start looking for the positive things you’ve experienced in a lifetime.

As you do this, I think you'll find anger and bitterness begin to dissipate. 

Maybe this is the time to make an important point about “counting blessings.”  I don’t think we can count blessings for anyone else.  If they're not ready to pick up a calculator themselves, they probably won't pay attention to your figures. Remember what they say about trying to teach a pig to sing: it wastes your time and annoys the pig.

Maybe the best thing you can do is model an attitude of gratitude.  Be honest about the tough things you may be going through, but be sure to mention the good things as well.

When you count your blessings, consider finding practical ways to demonstrate your gratitude. That will help you impress it on your memory.  For example, if there’s someone who was especially kind or helpful to you, you might write a letter thanking them.  If you’re grateful for the comfort the Bible gives you, consider giving a donation to an organization that provides Bibles for mission groups.  You can think of ways.

Conclusion

Honest, clear-headed Christians realize that blessings add-up.  They especially add-up when we look for blessings where we wouldn’t ordinarily expect to find them. 

Blessings can pop up in the most unexpected places.  Paul told the Romans:  “We know that in everything God works for the good of those who love him.”^[1]  This is a reminder that God may bring blessing out of the most tragic circumstances.  The greatest example of this is the cross of Christ.  What appeared to be a disaster became the avenue for God’s greatest blessing.

I would by no means suggest how God might bring blessing from your toughest times, but I know it can happen.

More important, I know that in your toughest moment, God is with you.  And that is surely a blessing you can count.

 

 

 

---

^[1] The Holy Bible: New Century Version , Containing the Old and New Testaments. Dallas, TX : Word Bibles, 1991, S. Ro 8:28