Problem Children
I Thessalonians 5:14-15
Inexperienced people often hold one of two images of the
church. Both are wrong.
One suggests the church is filled with people who have
their lives together and have no problems or difficulties.
The other suggests the church is filled with neurotics
who couldn’t hope to function in the “real” world.
The truth isn’t
so much somewhere in the middle, as it is something entirely different. The church is neither a holy sideshow where
you may observe all manner of ecclesiastical freaks nor a kind of spiritual
club-med where you see nothing but tanned and toned specimens of
saintliness. It is more akin to a rehab
center where most residents are on the road to good health, some are still
seriously ill, and others are struggling with relapses.
The church at its best has a realistic view of itself.
As John Stott points out in his comments on this passage,
every church has its “problem children.”
Do you remember Designing
Women, the 90’s era TV series set in Atlanta? Julia Sugarbaker, one of the key characters,
once offered this observation about the difference between the North and the
South. She said that every family has
its crazy or weird members. In the
North, those members are locked away in the attic; in the South, they’re paraded out for
everyone to meet.
That’s a truth that can be applied to the church. We have our flawed members and, as in the
South, we don’t deny their existence.
But neither do we exploit them or resign ourselves to doing nothing to
heal them.
In this passage, Paul deals with a variety of these
problem children. And, to carry on the
image of the rehab center, he begins with those who resist getting with the
program before he moves on to those who will need a longer-term therapy. Keep in mind, the motivation for dealing
with all of them is a patient love.
We are all called to help individuals in the church be at
their best.
Meet Some “Problem Children”
At this point, we’re invited to meet some “problem children” we find in a
typical church. We meet them and learn
how we are to respond to them
1. In any church, we may find those who are
undisciplined: We are to admonish those
who are undisciplined.
The phrase is translated in a variety of ways and is understood to refer to
those who are "unruly," "disorderly," "shirkers,"
"idle," "lazy," "idlers," "careless,"
"loafers," and "vagabonds."
The AMP simply says "those who are out of line."
Just who did Paul have in
mind? Some will probably see a reference
to those who had stopped working because they believed the Second Coming was to
take place soon. According to this
explanation they had begun to leach off of more industrious Christians, thus
becoming a drain on the resources of the congregation. The word was sometimes used to refer to “lazy
idlers” who played truant or who neglected their duties. This idea is behind Peterson’s paraphrase in The Message: “,,,warn the freeloaders to get a move on.”
That may be what Paul had in mind but it’s possible he saw a greater threat.
The word comes out of a military
background and was used of those who brok rank to those who had defected from
the army or other duty. Consequently,
Vine sees the word as referring to the insubordinate. A loose translation tries to capture both
ideas by referring to those addressed as “lazy troublemakers.”
Coming as it does immediately
after Paul’s appeal for respect to be given to the leaders of the church,
perhaps there were some in the Thessalonian congregation who were failing in
this area. It probably wasn’t so much
open rebellion against leaders as it was a kind of passive aggression.
Today, Paul might apply this
exhortation to those who enjoy the benefits of the church but never commit
their time or talents to its work. In
most churches eighty percent of the work is done by twenty percent of the
people. A larger percentage may hold
positions on committees which meet once or twice a year, if that, but the real
week-to-week work is done by only a few people.
How are we to respond to such people.
We are to “admonish” them. The
basic idea is that of an earnest but gentle warning, one which is thoughtful
and well-reasoned. Aiirhart believes
Paul had in mind a private, rather than public, confrontation with those guilty
of such behavior. By no means are we to
make these “lazy troublemakers” the subject of gossip or to ignore their
behavior.
2. In any church, we may find those who are
disheartened: We are to encourage the
disheartened.
The word is translated in several ways:
"Fainthearted," in several translations,
"frightened," "timid," “apprehensive,“ or
"afraid" in others; Webster
and Young translate it as "feeble-minded" but Vine believes this to
be a poor rendering. The word, oligopsuchos, means
"small-spirited" and carries the idea of someone about to give
up. The word "disheartened"
might be an appropriate synonym.
Maybe they were among those who suffered because things didn’t happen the
way they expected.
There are those who get tired in the pilgrimage; rather than chasten them or shame them, Paul
says we are to encourage them--give them the courage to keep going.
There are many fearful people in our churches. They are afraid for a variety of
reasons. Past failures. Spiritual threats, real and imagined. A culture perceived to be at odds with all
things godly. The media and the public
schools.
How are we to respond to the disheartened?
Not with shaming or ridicule, but with encouragement. We are to do our best to infuse them with the
courage to go on.
3.
In any church, we may find those who are weak: We are to support the weak.
TCNT says "give a helping hand to the weak." Weak is used in almost every
translation.
Some commentators feel the weak may be particularly susceptible to moral
temptation. This might be part of the
explanation, but it may simply refer to those whose defenses have been worn
down.
If the undisciplined were
careless about the pilgrimage, the disheartened frightened and discouraged, the
weak were completely drained, unable to go on.
They would need special help to get them going again. A key notion is that they are not to be
abandoned. One writer says the idea is that
of putting an arm around them.
The kind of help given is to be supportive, help which sustains.
The help Paul prescribes may be more than just a pat on the back for the asthenes are "strengthless"
(Strong).
A Key to Successful Ministry with the Problem
Child
Paul couldn’t list every possible “problem child” in a
congregation, so he gives a key to successful ministry to every needy
person: “Be patient with everyone.” Here was an instruction which covers each
case. No matter how exasperating these
individuals might be, real change would result only if someone showed them
patience. That would not be easy. Vine translates the word as
"long-tempered." We all know
people who are short-tempered, this is the opposite.
Arthur Holmes comments on the challenge of being
patient. He says, “Ministering to those
in the body who have deep needs or hurts, as Paul here urges us to do, is often
difficult, sometimes simply because people do not always respond, heal, or grow
as fast as we think they should. This
may be why Paul adds a word about patience at this point.”
Patience is a challenge but it may be rewarded with seeing
the lives of the problem children transformed.
The patient may see the undisciplined become focused and
useful to the Kingdom of God.
The patient may see the disheartened become bold and
confident in the face of the challenges of living for Christ.
The patient may see the weak mount up with wings as
eagles, run and not be weary, walk and not faint.
The Motive Which Shapes Our Approach to
Problem Children
Love should
shape our approach to problem children. This verse describes that love. This love helps make this patience possible.
Look at the
negative picture of that love:
"Take care that none of you every pays back evil for evil."
Striking back at those who hurt us or frustrate us is a
“natural” impulse.
Christian love calls on us to resist that impulse.
Look at the
positive picture of that love:
"Always aim at what is best for each other and for everyone."
Agape transcends
emotion and calls us to seek the best for others. Because of this it must be thoughtful; what is best for another is not always
immediately apparent to us or to the other person. Although we cannot ignore another's
happiness, seeking to make the other person happy may not be in their best
interests. The child who must make the
nursing home decision for a parent is not likely to make that parent happy but
it may be the most loving thing to do.
Doing the loving
thing may make the other person temporarily unhappy with us. This may be discovered when we must oppose a
self-destructive lifestyle or other behaviors which are offering temporary
pleasure to someone. Since evangelism--presenting
the good news--may involve beginning with the "bad news," witnessing
may be another venue in which seeking the best for another may involve making
another unhappy for a while.
Look at that
love's breadth: "...for each
other and for everyone."
Love is to be
demonstrated within the Christian community, that is a given; but it is to also be demonstrated to those
outside the community. This was one of
the distinguishing marks of the early church, distinguishing and radical.
When love looks at problem children, it sees more than
the problem; it sees the potential.
Conclusion
Every church—even good churches, like the Thessalonian
church, has its problem children. Who’s
to try to help them? The pastor? Sure.
The deacons? Sure. But not because of their titles. Every Christian is called to help these people.
Ernest Best:
“Paul lays the responsibility for the whole community on the community
itself; each member, and not the leaders
alone, must be aware of his or her responsibility for others and seek to help
them. At no stage can the ordinary
member lean back and say, ‘This is the task of the ministry alone.’ Paul knows nothing of an inert mass, the
congregation, on which the ministry operates.”
The church at its best will be a place where people get
better.
