The power
of God to bring good out of the deepest tragedy is well documented in the
Scripture. There’s little room for
argument that he can do it. But, the
truth is, our vision isn’t 20/20 in such matters, our imagination is
limited: we can’t always see how God
will be able to do what must be done to bring some good out of our
tragedy. This is why this truth is never
the first thing I would try to impress upon a Christian going through a hard
time.
Sometimes the
best response to someone in the early days of dealing with trouble is no
response at all. Actually, the response
might be to just be there and to listen.
Hear the person. Help the person
in practical ways. If there has been a sudden
death in the family, make sure there is food in the pantry or that coffee or
tea is available. Offer to feed the dog
or the cat, dust the living room, or some other mundane thing. There will be time for deeper discussions
later. Still, if your friend wants to
talk, don’t avoid discussing the whys.
I would
never try to argue that the loss felt by a suffering Christian will somehow be
restored. The Book of Job ends with a
recitation of how Job’s fortunes were reversed, again. He now had more land, more cattle, and
greater wealth than before. And, the man
who had lost seven sons and three daughters once again became the father of
seven sons and three daughters. Did
these really replace his children? Was
he never to feel grief for those who had died?
Drs. Áida
and William Spencer are seminary professors who are co-authors of Joy Through the Night: Biblical Resources for Suffering People. The book begins by describing the impact upon
his family of the drowning death of William’s five-year-old sister Carol. That loss inspired his interest in how
Christians respond to tragedy.
The
Spencers offer an observation on Job’s “replacement” children:
Not until this year did Áida
[William’s wife] realize that for Mother Spencer she was like one of Job’s
second set of daughters. How did Job
feel about those first children? Did the
second set really replace them? The text
does not say so. But Áida has no doubt
that she is a second daughter, in a sense replacing her mother-in-law’s first
daughter, Carol…. Áida is treated with
gratitude that far outweighs her own grace.
She is a new daughter by marriage.
Her mother-in-law always appreciates and speaks well of her daughter
Carol. But she is no longer overwhelmed
by the tragedy of her death. Áida is not
Carol, but she is a welcome substitute appreciated for her own sake.
In theory the possibility of
having ten new children replace ten former ones seems grotesque. How can any human being be replaced? In practice, no human being can be
reincarnated in another human. Yet a
substitute can help one turn to the present and to the future, away from being
engulfed by regrets of the past. (p.
150-51)
I don’t
believe God’s power to bring good out of tragedy ever allows us to minimize the
pain of another. As I said in the sermon
recently posted, I do believe that power allows us to say to the hurting
person: Don’t think that nothing good
will ever happen to you again.
